It is wise to master your self, but it is wiser to leave a few rogue thoughts, some few doubts, and some loose ends. It is into the wild and unfinished places that we can grow. ― Chris Ernest Nelson

I hope to always have a to-do list. In other words, I never want completely finished business. And in the spirit of what’s unfinished, below is my 40 during 40s list. Please note I didn’t do a 40 by 40 list. 1. I wasn’t ready. 2. Covid. 3. I’ve learned I’m not into deadlines for stuff like this. The anxiety produced by a date can paralyze me.

These are dreams, some of which might happen overnight while others will take time.

With less than two weeks until the big day I consider this the kick-off of sorts. This isn’t some random bucket list or carefully curated “midlife moment.” It’s a culmination of leftovers from my thirties and a need for new(ish) adventures. It’s my life vision. Think whatever you want, but I am focused. More importantly, I am fearless.

  1. Publish. It’s been a dream since forever. It’s ongoing. I’m picking up the pen, literally.
  2. Rockstar shape status. I don’t even know what this is exactly, but I want to look in the mirror and love my reflection freely and proudly.
  3. Write a song with Ed Sheeran. I told you this was random, but whatever it’s my list.
  4. Go the place that explains the dreams in my head aka the home of Anne Shirley. Prince Edward Island, here I come.
  5. The Matriarchs. If you know, you know. Otherwise you will soon.
  6. Coffee with Dan Fogelman. Also, I’m not okay about This Is Us ending.
  7. Work at Z100 with Elvis Duran.
  8. Go to Woodstock Vermont and take a basic bridge photo. Google it!
  9. Spend more time in Buffalo, New York aka my hometown.
  10. Visit the places/homes my grandparents were born.
  11. Create a Christmas carnival to help support small businesses.
  12. Do goat yoga. I am fascinated.
  13. A trip with college friends. Sherri, I miss you.
  14. Celebrate someone’s 100th birthday.
  15. Watch a Broadyway show come to life.
  16. Volunteer with Habitat for Humanity.
  17. Work on “the show.” Again, if you know, you know.
  18. Be in more photos with my children.
  19. Go to the ocean more.
  20. Go on tour with The Jonas Brothers. Sincerely, I really feel like I’ve missed a moment here.
  21. Bartend.
  22. Write letters to former teachers.
  23. I want to learn to curl and host a curling tournament.
  24. Bring a WNY meat raffle to the garden state.
  25. Go whitewater rafting.
  26. Speak to a big crowd. I love big crowd energy.
  27. Climb a mountain. Why the hell not?
  28. Family interviews. They’ll torture me with sarcasm, but I want them on tape.
  29. Have all the old family VHS tapes converted to CD and/or digital files.
  30. Help someone believe in something bigger and better again.
  31. Volunteer with Special Olympics.
  32. Run a 5k. I am not a runner, I hate running, but I love the feeling of completing a race.
  33. Gather with friends more. I look forward to celebrating and savoring the relationships in my life.
  34. Plan a trip to Paris. I’ve never been and I can’t live vicariously through Emily in Paris. It simply won’t do.
  35. Visit as many new coffee shops as I can. Coffee is everything.
  36. Find my fashion style. Seriously, I’ve got to get out of these leggings.
  37. Become the primary earner. This isn’t a competition, but I’d sincerely like to out earn my husband. I need to do more than believe it’s possible.
  38. Get a major brand partnership for the blog.
  39. Relaunch A Madison Mom.
  40. Begin and end each day with a thank you prayer.